Understand My Cat, Understand Me

If you want to understand me and/or other women, pay attention to the nearest cat.

KEY POINTS:

Approach: Walk up to a cat too fast and it bolts. Reach down to pet it without letting it check you out first results in empty space and a skittish cat. Come on too strong with me, and I’m outta there. Don’t be pushy, don’t be too aggressive. Cool and calm with a hint of interest work out well. Give me a chance to check you out so I can get comfortable and you’re golden.

Spending Time with You is a Choice: When a cat approaches you, rubs up against you, or sits on your lap, she is making a choice.  She is primarily content to independently sit in the corner, on the counter, or on the couch but, at that moment, she has decided she’d rather be with you. Like a cat, if I agree to spend time with you, don’t take it lightly. I could have accepted a date with someone else, I could have spent the time hanging out with my friends, or I could happily be on the couch with my cat. Don’t ask me if I like you. Don’t make me have some kind of talk about my feelings. Don’t ask for reassurance because you’re feeling insecure. I’m there, aren’t I?

Affection: Cats signal you to be affectionate with them. They walk up to you, rub against you, look at you sweetly, and purr in response. Similarly, I’ll make eye contact, look at you like I like you, and, practically start purring when you hold my hand, touch my hair, or gently kiss me.  Pay attention to these signals. Don’t stop to ask if you can kiss me. That ruins the moment. At the same time, if I’m not giving you those signals, don’t touch me.

Space and Time: Albeit in disagreement with popular opinion, cats prefer to be around people.  They won’t be forced into it. They choose it. And, they choose it when they are comfortable and are getting enough time on their own as well. I have an introverted soul.

  1. When the needs of my introverted soul aren’t met, I become very grumpy and frustrated. As such, it is essential that I have time to myself and that time be honored by whomever might be pursuing me. I don’t want to have to defend why I need this time, I do. If your goal is to bring out the purring, sweet kitty in me, respect my down time. Recognize that I need it. Allow me to have it sans guilt. You won’t be sorry.

I’ll likely eventually blog about the differences between dogs and cats. But, for now, I’ll say that I think that women are more similar to cats and guys tend towards a puppy-like state. This isn’t good versus bad. It’s male/female differences. *Just Sayin*

Happy Dating!

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